"Tits On A Plane" -- coming soon to the Hell Center Mall Megaplex

You almost don't need Jon Stewart when the jokes write themselves like this:

Authorities Warning Women Not to Wear Gel Bras As Worries of Possible Female Bombers Increase

U.S. authorities are advising women not to wear gel bras on airplanes as information developed in the foiled London plot points to an expanding role for women in smuggling explosives on to an aircraft.

Authorities at Scotland Yard are questioning a husband and wife, suspects in the London terror plot, about allegations that they were planning to use their baby's bottle to hide a liquid bomb.

Police in the U.K. have recovered baby bottles containing peroxide, including some with false bottoms, from a recycling center close to the homes of some of the arrested suspects.

The use of female suicide bombers has been successful in previous airplane attacks.

So....someone investigates using a baby bottle and that segues seamlessly to -- gel bras?

Makes you wonder what the folks at the Department of Homeland Security talk about over their Oscar Mayer Bologna and Velveeta on White Bread with Miracle Whip sandwiches.

But I did say that you ALMOST don't need Jon Stewart. Emphasis on "almost":